Things of the Week

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This week I mostly… single-handedly ate my way through the giant chocolate and raspberry pavlova I baked last weekend, much to the disgust of myself and everyone around me. When not eating meringue, which wasn't all that often, I found myself alternately prone to the most overwhelming bouts of melancholy and rage. I have since come to realise these violent moodswings may have been sugar related. Most infuriatingly stupid TV character of the week Nashville is a truly incredible television show. It has drama, and schmalzy country tunes, and Hayden Panettiere doing her best Taylor Swift impression, and handsome men, and bourbon. Unfortunately, every third or so scene ends up weighed down by this empty-headed yokel:

I'd tell you exactly what it is she does to annoy me, but my blood sugar levels are still all over the place and I don't know what might happen.

Dessert I least want to ever eat again of the week Nigella's dark chocolate and raspberry pavlova, coming to a weekend kitchen blog feature near you.

Baffling UK number 1 of the week

Those midi horns! The flat-as-Cheryl's-arse verses! It's not just me, is it? Tinie Tempah's rap includes the term "dickmatised", for god's sake! SHE SPLIT UP GIRLS ALOUD FOR THIS!!!!

Book I've still not round to finishing of the week Look Emma Healey, I'm working on it. I don't know what more you can ask. I've had a lot of pavlova to get through.

Most jarring use of slow motion farm animals of the week The first part in BBC2's new series, The Stuarts. Every ten minutes, halfway through yet another example of how crazy Charles I was, just as you're expecting a steady pan across an elaborate palace ceiling, BAM - slow motion close-up of horse eating hay.

Inexplicable.

Thing of the Week

MY NEW HEADPHONES OMG:

For years I've suspected I'm more musical than most people give me credit for, and now I've finally got the massive clunky headphones to prove it. Cheryl Cole has never sounded so good, even though she's really pretty bad. That's how good the new headphones are.

This week's Things of the Week comes courtesy of Talisker, 10 years. I will no doubt regret this tomorrow morning.