This Civil Wars Album Cover is Perfect For Every Other Imploding Pop Band

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The Civil Wars have a new record out. I’ve not actually listened to any of it yet—let’s be honest, who has the time—but is this not an album cover and a half?

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A giant, deathly-black plume of poisonous smoke, billowing forth from the wreckage of their professional and personal relationships. Surely there can be no better visual metaphor for the Civil Wars in 2013—a band on the rocks; a musical duo gone far beyond even the most cursory of album promo jaunts.

This got me thinking.

The Civil Wars are by no means the only band to record a new record whilst in a doom spiral of mutual despair and self-loathing. Why did no one beat them to it?

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Poor ABBA. Not the only band forced back into the studio for one last album when all hope and motivation was long lost, but surely one of the few pop outfits where each member found themselves newly divorced to someone else in the room. AGAIN, AGNETHA. YOU’RE NOT LEAVING UNTIL YOU NAIL THAT MIDDLE-EIGHT. STOP CRYING, BJÖRN.

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Condolences too must go to Carl Barât of the Libertines, who through contractual obligations wrote, recorded and toured 14 tracks featuring his erstwhile bandmate and burglar.

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Where did it all go wrong for ITV’s shiny-eyed popstars? Was it scraping together a second album of tired leftovers a mere nine months after their first? Poorly remembered prime time TV venture Hear’Say It’s Saturday? Or when Kym Marsh (incorrectly) concluded that members of her own band (MYLEEEEEEENE) had been shopping her out to the tabloids about some confected nonsense involving ‘our boys’ (of course) in Oman? I guess we’ll never know. But it was probably the Kym/Myleene thing.

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We can only assume Robbie Williams quit purely to spite the writer of this signature hit: a particularly delicious act of self-harm given said writer also happened to be his occasional bandmate and full-time frenemy, Gary Barlow. MORE LIKE GONE FOR GOOD, AM I RIGHT GARY

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You’re welcome, record label album re-issue people.


After similar tomfoolery?

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